Quotes, Tales & Stuff
Quotes
"You've got to spin it to win it" - Martyn Archer Facebook
posting prior to Newhaven match. Obviously not familiar with Pevensey's
seamer friendly selection policy, or his inability to turn the ball.
"I'm doing alright aren't I?" Dave
Temple. Opening the batting away against Eastbourne 3's, Shirley tries
to encourage the cringing spectators after playing and missing 3 times,
and being dropped twice in the same over.
"I don't care what he said. You and I both know it was f***ing out."
Craig Hornby offers his opinion to the batsman regarding an apparently
stone dead lbw in the last over against Hailsham. The game was tied.
"We're gonna have a bat." Infamous Plumley-ism, after
winning the toss at home against Plumpton and East Chiltington railways.
A Pev team containing 7 bowlers was then bowled out for 43. Nasser
Hussain (Sydney 2003) and Ricky Ponting (Edgbaston 2005) have both since
rung to thank Plum for taking some of the heat away from them.
"and you got a fairly shit haircut too." Corbishley figuring the only way to defend a total of 43 against Plumpton was to try 'witty banter', the batsman certainly bit.
"If that was the case, Plum would have been arrested years ago." Following the Pakistan spot fixing furore, Kamran Akmal's butter fingers drag a few other inept fielders down with them.
"Next time i f***ing run in to bowl you'd better be f***ing ready." Martin Hole, after being stopped once too often during his run up, away to St. Peters.
"What do they want us to do? Carry them into position?" Suggestion from a Pev fielder, after the umpires ask us to get through our overs quicker at home to Rye. The two 70 year olds in the slip cordon were not being given any special dispensation.
"I've Retired!" Tingles, circa 2009-2010
"No-one puts Holey in the corner!" Corbishley, circa 2009
"Who's keeping you out the firsts? Chris Gayle?" Bells Yew Green Wicketkeeper as Louis smashed 125* for the 2nd XI, 13th June 2009
(Talking about the great night had drinking copious amounts of Harveys at the dinner) "The Mrs nearly threw up when she came in the kitchen after my spectacular 18 second fart!"
Wally, Nice, 2nd February 2008
(Talking about computers in the pub) "I don't really understand them. But that's ok, they'll never catch on!"
Holey, on his club debut, hopefully a sign of more to come, 12th May 2007
"She Don't Wanna Marry Richard!"
Plum, pointing out a few home truths while tucking into his Kebab Kingdom banquet, you had to be there, but it was classic, 2nd September 2006
"You've Just Embarassed Yourself Now"
Big Dom responds to Little Common Ramblers wicketkeepers words 29th July 2006
"Put That On Your Fu$%ing Website!"
Little Common Ramblers wicketkeeper after smiting a boundary (eventually), he was apparently not impressed by previous comments on said website. Nice to see we have readership anyway 5th August 2006
"I Don't Go On Holiday That Far!"
Willingdon fielder as he observes one of Russty's orbit-entering blows 29th July 2006
"Shit! I was supposed to pick up my brother!"
Nigel Parks arrives, sans Gary Parks, Pre-Season Meeting 23rd March 2006
"Isn't the weather supposed to be bad!?"
A seemingly good point from Gary Perkins at the Pre-Season Meeting, however, had he been paying attention he'd have realised we were discussing painting the inside of the pavilion... And he's the new 2nd XI/Sunday Captain... Ominous, 23rd March 2006
"He Smelt Poor"
Sarah Tingley, she wasn't wrong, January 2006.
"Coffee!....Before Beer!"
Martin Hole, outraged at the 6 Bells barmaids' order of service, August 2005.
"I'm gonna Captain the 2's next season"
John Plumley, disillusioned, Entire 2005 Season.
"I'm gonna play for the 2's next season"
Mike Tingley, equally disillusioned, Entire 2005 Season.
"Told you it wouldn't be enough"
John Plumley, post Pevensey successfully chasing Beaulieu's 293-8, August 2003
"A Thrilling Game of Cricket"
Vicky has written to say "I don't know if you submit results to the Evening Argus or Sussex Express but yesterday's division 5 match between DPB Eastbourne 2nds and
Vicky was asking whether 263 was the highest score successfully chased. Just a week earlier Beaulieu made 293-8 in their Division 3 match with Pevensey who then reached the total for the loss of 2 wickets.
It just about summed up our season!
Mick Collins
Beaulieu Cricket Club
ESCL Website News, nice that the Pev talents are recognized, does it mean we hold the record!? August 2003
"That won't be enough"
John Plumley, optimistic at tea after Beaulieu rack up 293-8, August 2003. Read above for result.
"Old Silver" An Ode to Terry Lewis
He came to us a birdseye man,
One well remembered day,
He looked so very big and strong,
With hair three shades of grey.
He's nicknamed Errol Flynn by some,
The reason's plane to see,
It's wrapped around his money belt,
And three times round his knee.
Some say he is a careful man,
Some say he's even thrifty,
He won't give up his paper round,
Although he's nearly fifty.
He stands there in his whites so smart,
A rock beside the wicket,
With all the style and all the gear,
But no idea of cricket.
Holidays he never takes,
And motor cars are banned,
He went and took a test-drive once,
But broke the saleman's hand.
That stupid man must blame himself,
For trying to be so funny,
With Terry in the driving seat,
He went and mentioned money.
His bank accounts stretch round the world,
From Paris to Calcutta,
But if you ask him for a quid,
He coughs and starts to splutter,
But our Tel's quite a caring man,
He wouldn't let you beg,
But if repayment's one day late,
He'll break your bleedin leg!
So if you see big Tel today,
With on his face a frown,
He'll ask you of my whereabouts,
Just tell him I've left town!